Writing about family

Today’s prompt for Linda’s Just Jot It January is “family,” contributed by Kim of Twisted Trunk Travels. Check out their blogs!

Over these last ten-ish years of writing poetry and blogging here at Top of JC’s Mind, I have written way more often about my family than I thought I would. Of course, it made perfect sense to blog about visiting daughter E and son-in-law L in Hawai’i, as folks often blog about their travels, but as time and circumstances changed and I faced the challenges of caregiving for various generations of the family, posts about family became more frequent. I also used poetry as a way to process things that were going on with my family, most notably about my mother’s experiences living with and dying from heart disease, which became my first published chapbook, Hearts (Kelsay Books, 2023).

I do try to protect my family members by referring to them with initials or nicknames rather than their given names. Nearly all of them use a different surname so only people who know us in real life are likely to recognize them from posts. Currently, spouse B and daughter T are most likely to appear as we are living in the same house, although we will soon be going to visit daughter E, son-in-law L, and granddaughters ABC and JG in London. which may generate some posts. My daughters’ grandparents were called on the blog by the names they used for them, Nana and Paco for my parents and Grandma for B’s mom. (Sadly, B’s dad, known as Grandpa, passed away in 2005, before I was blogging and writing poetry, although his death was the subject of one of my earliest published poems.) If you are perusing the archives of Top of JC’s Mind, you’ll come across posts dealing with their final years and the grief following their deaths.

One thing that strikes me about my family posts and poems is how often they spark comments and conversations about people’s own experiences. Knowing that I offer that space for people to reflect on themselves and their own families is a big part of why I continue to write about my family.

What about you? Do you find it helpful to write about your family, either privately in a journal or in more public ways?
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It’s not too late to join in with #JusJoJan24! Find out more here: https://lindaghill.com/2024/01/29/daily-prompt-jusjojan-the-29th-2024/

SoCS: the phone

At this point in my life, I’m not a big fan of the telephone.

It can take a lot of time and energy to convince myself to make the call, especially if I know I’m likely to have to work through endless phone menus or get put on hold multiple times and shuffled between service personnel.

(Yeah, looking at you insurance companies, utilities, etc.)

There were periods in my younger years when the phone was an important lifeline and source of connection – when B used to travel a lot on business, when I was away from my mom.

Even after my parents retired near us, I usually also spoke to them every day by phone, even on days when I also saw them in person.

Those calls were not hard to make. Or receive.

I still use my landline for calls whenever I can and still have an answering machine to pick up if I can’t – or if the caller ID suspects spam, which is most of the time these days. All three of us happened to be out together earlier this week and I went to check the machine for messages when we got home. I realized that since Paco (my father) died over two years ago I seldom get personal messages on my phone.

Actually, it’s longer ago than that because Paco forgot how to make phone calls in his last months.

Somehow, though, I keep checking for a call…
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday/Just Jot It January today is “make the call.” Join us! Find out more here: https://lindaghill.com/2024/01/26/the-friday-reminder-for-socs-jusjojan-2024-daily-prompt-jan-27th/

One-Liner Wednesday: story books

It had been startling and disappointing to me to find out that story books had been written by people, that books were not natural wonders, coming of themselves like grass.

Eudora Welty

Join us for Linda’s One-Liner Wednesdays and/or Just Jot It January! Find out more here: https://lindaghill.com/2024/01/24/one-liner-wednesday-jusjojan24-the-24th-lights-keep-flickering/

Reblog: Marilyn McCabe on Gail DiMaggio

Marilyn McCabe and Gail DiMaggio are original members of the Boiler House Poets Collective, which is how we met. I am pleased to reblog this post from Marilyn’s blog, O Write, in which she offers her reflections on Gail’s poem, “Metta for Judy who Loved a Biker”.

I don’t want to steal any thunder from Marilyn or Gail here, but urge you to check it out.
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Join us for Linda’s Just Jot It January! Find out more here: https://lindaghill.com/2024/01/23/daily-prompt-jusjojan-the-23rd-2024/

JC’s Confessions #28

In the first few seasons of The Late Show, Stephen Colbert did a recurring skit, then a best-selling book, called Midnight Confessions, in which he “confesses” to his audience with the disclaimer that he isn’t sure these things are really sins but that he does “feel bad about them.” While Stephen and his writers are famously funny, I am not, so my JC’s Confessions will be somewhat more serious reflections, but they will be things that I feel bad about. Stephen’s audience always forgives him at the end of the segment; I’m not expecting that – and these aren’t really sins – but comments are always welcome.

I tend to stick with social media platforms, even when they do objectionable things.

I admire those who have stopped reading/posting on Facebook/Meta, X/twitter, Substack, etc. in a principled response to their behavior, but I haven’t been able to bring myself to follow suit.

Instead, I’ve carved out my own way to shelter myself from misinformation and vitriol. I use tools and filters so that I see posts from people I follow rather than a general feed. I manage to block most advertisements. I interact with some platforms, such as Substack, nearly exclusively through articles being sent to my email rather than going to their site. I try not to read comments on political, environmental, religious, or anything-even-vaguely-controversial posts, because things get nasty quickly. I’ve recently started limiting the comments on some of my posts on X to only people that I follow to avoid being attacked over believing in fossil-fuel-driven climate change.

Part of the reason I’ve maintained my presence on some platforms is that there are people with whom I’m connected only there. It’s also because I’m afraid to lose any contacts that I have for my blog and my poetry. I don’t have a large number of followers, so I’m loathe to cut any of them off.

This strategy has been working okay for me for now, but that could change. I’m hoping that my posts create tiny moments of sanity for those that do happen across them.

I also want to thank those that have left platforms for calling attention to problems with social media. I applaud your voices and your commitment.

Maybe, someday, I’ll manage to follow your example.
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Join us for Linda’s Just Jot It January! Find out more here: https://lindaghill.com/2024/01/22/daily-prompt-jusjojan-the-22nd-2024/

for the love of plants

My daughter T loves plants.

She loves them so much that she has a master’s degree in conservation biology of plants. One of her favorite things to do is remove invasive species so that native species can thrive. She can expound at length on the topic of relocating plant species to different elevations and latitudes to help them survive the effects of climate change.

At the moment, it’s winter here and she is recovering from shoulder surgery, so no eradicating of invasive species allowed in the near future.

She has to content herself with tending our indoor plants.

Under her care, the African violets and kalanchoe are in bloom.
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I shockingly used the prompt “plants” from J-Dub of J-Dub’s Grin and Bear It as part of Linda’s Just Jot It January. (It’s only shocking because I seldom use the prompts and usually meander off in my own direction.) Whether you want to use prompts or not, please join us! Find out more here: https://lindaghill.com/2024/01/21/daily-prompt-jusjojan-the-21st-2024/

SoCS: what’s in a nutshell?

As a writer, or even as a speaker, I have a lot of trouble with putting things in a nutshell.

I don’t like to commit things to print or speech unless I’ve had a long time to mull them and reflect on them deeply. By the time I’ve done that, there is too much material to stuff into a nutshell. (She says while writing stream of consciousness with minimal reflection time…)

I guess I save my “nutshell communication” for poetry, when I’m usually looking to distill the essence into as few words as possible. Just the meat of the matter. Still, though, carrying depth.

Metaphor helps…
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is “in a nutshell.” To find out more about joining the fun of Stream of Consciousness Saturday and/or Just Jot It January, visit here: https://lindaghill.com/2024/01/19/the-friday-reminder-for-socs-jusjojan-2024-daily-prompt-jan-20th/

One-Liner Wednesday: doing right

The time is always right to do what’s right.

Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

Join us for Linda’s One-Liner Wednesday and/or Just Jot It January! Find out more here: https://lindaghill.com/2024/01/17/one-liner-wednesday-jusjojan24-the-17th-grateful/

Writing

I’m a bit of – okay, more than a bit – an outlier in Linda’s Just Jot It January event in that I seldom use the provided prompts other than for One-Liner Wednesdays and Stream of Consciousness Saturdays. My blog is called Top of JC’s Mind because I write about whatever is at the top of my mind, which could be family, poetry, health, politics, spirituality, environmental issues, movies, or anything else. Today, though, I provided the #JusJoJan24 prompt, writing, hoping it would be an easy one for all of us, including me (especially me?), to use.

When I was in grammar school, we did a lot of both creative and academic/utilitarian writing in our two-room school which went up through grade 8. Besides learning to write theme papers and business and friendly letters and such, we also wrote stories and poems. I remember writing outside of school for fun, too. My sisters and I would often make our own greeting cards with poems we wrote ourselves.

At the high school I attended about twenty miles from home, there was still a lot of writing but very little of it was creative. Busy with academic writing, I stopped writing poetry and fiction. This trend continued when I was a student at Smith College – lots of writing, but none of it in fiction or poetry. I’ve wondered if the Boutelle-Day Poetry Center had existed back in my student days whether I would have written and studied poetry as an undergrad. As it happened, I made the happy discovery that I could write music; composition became an important part of my major. As a singer, organist, and composer, words were often entwined with my musical experiences, which kept me in conversation with poetry and literary writing, even when I wasn’t practicing it myself.

There has been a lot of writing in my life after Smith. There has always been correspondence, first on paper and later mostly electronic. Many of my volunteer activities had major writing components. In my years on the liturgy committee at my church, I wrote prayers and what we jokingly termed “homilettes” on seasonal themes. I worked on documents on curriculum development as a volunteer on curriculum and honors diploma committees when my daughters were in school. I researched and wrote commentary on the dangers of fracking for years as part of the rapid response team in New York State. Every once in a while, I would be inspired to write a poem, but nearly all my writing was utilitarian prose.

That changed when I turned fifty. My friend Yvonne was leading a year-long book study of Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés’s Women Who Run with the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype. A circle of women met monthly to discuss a section of the book and then create art in response. I spontaneously started to write poems to accompany my art pieces, a practice known as ekphrasis, though I didn’t know the word at the time. I had lost the church that had sometimes performed my music and I think that creative energy found a home in writing poetry.

After a poem I had written was chosen as part of a National Poetry Month initiative at our local public broadcasting radio station, I learned about the Binghamton Poetry Project and started attending their community poetry workshops, which are led by graduate students at Binghamton University. I quickly became serious about poetry and wanted to submit work for publication. One of the BPP directors found a local circle of poets meeting regularly to workshop poems that I could join. We are now known as the Grapevine Poets and I will be forever grateful to them for all their help and support with my poems and manuscripts. Last year was a milestone for me when Kelsay Books published my first chapbook of poetry, Hearts.

Running roughly concurrently with the resurgence of poetry in my life has been my blogging life. When I was writing so much fracking and political commentary, friends suggested I give blogging a try. I wasn’t sure if I could make it work but Top of JC’s Mind turned ten last September. I just passed 1,900 posts total, so there’s a lot there if anyone cares to rummage around! As part of my tenth anniversary celebration, I also finally got my own domain name, so you can also visit the blog through my author site at joannecorey.com.

Words are powerful and nearly all of us are writers, whether we are doing it for personal use or public audience. I hope that, whatever writing you do, it brings you some sense of peace, joy, clarity, outreach, and stability.

Write on!

SoCS: headshots

My family is not that big on taking photographs all the time. I am particularly disinclined to selfies, so there are not a lot of close-ups of me.

As a poet, though, one often has to submit headshots to accompany poems and bios, so…

I was lucky that relatively early in my publishing experience I wrote a poem on a prompt from Silver Birch Press for their MY MANE MEMORIES series, which was about our hair. My poem was called “Crowning Glory.” We had to send a close-up photo of ourselves, illustrating the poem, so spouse B and I went into our backyard on a sunny day to show off my silver locks in the sunshine.


Since then, I’ve used this photo whenever I needed to submit a headshot. It’s appeared in a number of journals and is on the back cover of my chapbook, Hearts (Kelsay Books, 2023). It’s the photo that is used here at Top of JC’s Mind and on its Facebook page. When I don’t have a more relevant photo to go with a blog post on Instagram, I use this headshot.

At this point, this close-up is a bit out of date. After cataract surgery, I no longer wear glasses on a regular basis. Due to some dental issues that required using orthodontia to correct my bite, my smile looks a bit different. I have a few more smile wrinkles now.

I really should have a new close-up taken.

Still, I’m so attached to this one and have spread it around to so many places, I’m not quite ready to replace it.

Maybe, someday…

[I should have included that I use this photo on my new author site (joannecorey.com), too. I really have plastered it everywhere!]
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is “close up/close-up.” Please join us for SoCS and/or Just Jot It January! Find out more here: https://lindaghill.com/2024/01/12/the-friday-reminder-for-socs-jusjojan-2024-daily-prompt-jan-13th/