Category: Stream of Consciousness Saturday

SoCS: What’s Next?

Given how things have been going lately – well, honestly, for years now – it is tempting fate to say I have any clue of what’s happening next.

A few things are relatively safe to say.

As in, today we will pick up my sister and niece at the bus station and meet up with Nana and Paco and my other sister and her husband for dinner. The four of them will be visiting for the weekend, which is a treat because we three sisters are only together a couple of times a year.

Early in the morning on Wednesday, daughter T will be heading to the airport to fly to Honolulu to visit daughter E and her spouse L for three weeks. August is turning into sister-togetherness month!

Other things that I think are coming up next are a bit murkier.

On August 17, we think Nana will be have a procedure as part of the continuing saga of the errant CPR/fainting spell.  While we hope it will go forward, it’s been delayed and re-scheduled once already, so fingers crossed. Results from this test will help us move on to what’s next for her treatment.

As for me, part of what’s next is working on my poetry collection. I did a revision of a poem this morning. Yay, me! If my desktop computer and printer co-operate – not a given at this point – I hope to print hard copies of poems to better arrange and re-arrange and re-arrange the poems. I may have pages to represent poems that I plan to write but that aren’t yet written. Then, I can look for holes so that I know how many more poems I need to write.

Meanwhile, I will continue to workshop poems in the collection. Eventually, I’ll have to make a stab at a table of contents and probably a forward and some notes here and there.

And maybe put a call out for some readers…

Oh, and try to have it finished before the Boiler House Poets reunion at MASS MoCA which starts September 30.

Are you laughing yet?

I have my work cut out for me, but, as always, what’s next is not totally in my control.
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is to base the post on a word that contains “ex”. Come join us! Find out how here:  https://lindaghill.com/2016/08/05/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-aug-616/

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SoCS: art, poetry, and 30/30

Last November, I attended my first-ever poetry residency/workshop/conference at the Massachusetts Museum of Contemporary Art, known as MASS MoCA. It was held in conjunction with Tupelo Press, a non-profit independent press located just down the road in the Eclipse Mill loft.

It was amazing, difficult, intense, valuable, exhausting, overwhelming, and dozens of other adjectives. (Poets don’t use many adjectives. Bloggers are allowed.) Anyone who would like to read more about my experience can check out the November 2015 posts in my archive.

One of the many lasting benefits is that I have written a series of poems about art. I had written a few before that residency, but not nearly as many as afterward. There is a fancy name for poems about art, ekphrastic. Note:  spell check does not know what to do with the word ekphrastic.

Some of these poems, along with other poems about North Adams, the city where MASS MoCA is located, and the surrounding towns, will become my first-ever-attempt-at a poetry collection.

It’s complicated.

I grew up in a town about twenty miles from North Adams and went to high school in North Adams. We went there to shop and to visit relatives. The city has changed a lot over the years. I’ve changed a lot over the years. The poems deal with generations of our family, small towns and a small city, home, change, geography, and art.

It’s a lot.

It’s also a new experience.

I am about to print the poems that are completed and assemble them into sections and a manuscript, leaving space for some poems that aren’t yet written. I’ll look for holes that need to be filled.  And try to fill them.

I am hoping to have a reasonable working draft by the time our group of poets, who were the first group to experience the Mass MoCA/Tupelo collaboration, return for a reunion residency in October.

We call ourselves the Boiler House Poets, after an art/sound installation at MASS MoCA where we made a video of us reading poems.

I am giving a shout-out here to one of the Boiler House Poets, Gail Dimaggio, who is embarking on another exciting collaboration with Tupelo Press. She will be one of their 30/30 poets in August. She and a small group of poets will each write a new poem every day for thirty days, which will be posted on a special section of the Tupelo Press website. Everyone is invited to follow along! Gail has a new blog to accompany her journey:  https://gaildi.blogspot.com/.

Come join the poetry/blogging fun!
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is “art.” Come join us! Find out how here:  https://lindaghill.com/2016/07/29/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-3016/

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SoCS: wrapping up the week in a few seconds

I am taking a second while it is still Saturday to slip in an under-the-wire SoCS post before I go to bed.

I hope everyone has had a good week. It has been a strange week here in the US with the Republican convention, but I want to assure readers in other countries that the US is not the dangerous place that the speakers at the convention make it out to be. Crime is actually down.

I think we need less fear and suspicion and more love and empathy.

That goes for all nations.

Good night. Wishing you all peace.
JC
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is “second.”  Come join us! Find out how here:  https://lindaghill.com/2016/07/22/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-2316/

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SoCS: If x, then y

If x, then y.

I’ve been telling myself some version of that for years. It usually involves getting through some major project/issue/development – the “if” – so that “then” things will calm down and be organized and predictable and under control.

It almost never works out that way.

I am finally wising up and getting to the point where I don’t promise anyone, even myself, some future goal.

Too much can happen that was unforeseen or that results in a totally different chain of events than anticipated.

The only constant is change and all that…

A lot of things that I might have seen as if/then are morphing into hopes, rather than promises or commitments.

It’s a way to retain some level of sanity/calm/integrity.

People who read my blog know that the past few months have been difficult for me, beginning with the unexpected death of my mother-in-law in March. I had to pull back from a lot of my usual activities, including blogging practice, and I thought I had an idea of when and how I would work my way back to what I had been used to.

Then, a string of other things unfolded and I have had to acknowledge that I really don’t have a clue when I will resume or even if it is possible.

I will just do the best that I can.

My if/thens will be confined to simple straightforward statements, such as “If I schedule this post now, then it will appear on Saturday.”
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is if/then. Come join the fun! Find out how here:   https://lindaghill.com/2016/07/15/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-1616/ 

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SoCS: lack of concentration

Since my mother-in-law died unexpectedly this spring, I have been having a real problem with lack of concentration.

I’m sure it hasn’t been helped by a string of other events that have been demanding time and attention…

I find myself starting something, having something else pop into my head that I need to attend to, hopping over to that – and maybe something else – or two somethings else – before getting back to what I was doing in the first place.

I’m sure it isn’t very efficient…

I realize part of it is the result of my seeming inability to sleep consistently. And the fact that there is just a lot to do on a lot of different fronts.

I think part of it, though, is that it is genuinely harder to concentrate for extended periods of time.

My brain gets tired.

I find myself playing mindless games on the computer while the television is on in the evening. Often, the television isn’t demanding too much concentration in and of itself. I used to use part of evening TV time to visit and comment on other blogs, but I can’t seem to do it anymore.

It takes too much concentration.

Have I mentioned that I’m having a problem with concentration lately?
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is “concentration.” Please join us!  Find out how here: https://lindaghill.com/2016/07/08/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-916/

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SoCS: what I long for

Things I long for – or long for more abundantly:

peace
sleep
more hours to write
more hours when my brain is operating clearly enough to write
love
good health for my family, friends, and everyone else, too
co-operation for the common good
caring about important things
for public sanity and good will in the face of so many challenges
unity
an end to hunger, oppression, and deprivation

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This short and impossible list is  brought to be Linda’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday. This week’s prompt is “long.” Come join us! Find out how here:  https://lindaghill.com/2016/07/01/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-216/

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SoCS: drinking problem

I have a drinking problem.

But probably not the kind you are thinking of…

Because I have a condition called interstitial cystitis, also known as painful bladder syndrome, I can’t drink a lot of things that most people do.

Some, like coffee, are not a hardship for me to not drink because I don’t really like them. Same with black tea.

I do wish I could drink green tea, though. I can drink some herbal teas.

Soda and other carbonated things are no-nos!

Fruit juices are problematic as they are too acidic. I need to dilute them or take pills to counteract the acidity.

I do drink milk sometimes, but have had to give up one of my favorite drinks, hot cocoa, as chocolate is another irritant.

What I drink most of the time is water.

Which is safe, but a bit boring.

Oh, well.

Wells do bring us water…

(And, for the record, I don’t drink alcohol.)
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is “drink.” Come join us! Find out how here:  https://lindaghill.com/2016/06/24/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-2516/

 

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SoCS: project delay

One of my projects for this year is assembling a book of poetry, growing out of my first ever poetry residency last fall. 

And I am not getting much done these last few months…

There have been a lot of losses with a lot of aftermath.

I’ll get back to my collection at some point…

Wish me luck.
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is “book.”  Come join us! Find out how here:  https://lindaghill.com/2016/06/03/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-june-416/

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SoCS: heartbreaking news

I am writing this on Friday as we await news on a former pastor, Father James.

He is in a coma in ICU and expected to die soon.

The news is heartbreaking.

I am not heartbroken for him, as he will be released from suffering and dwelling in God who is Eternal Love.

I am heartbroken for his family and friends and all his former parishioners who will miss his care, concern, sense of humor, and gentleness. Although he was retired, he said Mass at local parishes. Just in the last few weeks, I attended a couple of Masses at which he presided.

He was the pastor of a church I attended for over twenty years. He was the pastor for both of my daughters’ baptisms and first communions, as well as my elder daughter’s confirmation. I served on liturgy committee for him for many years, as well as participating in music ministry with my daughters.

After he retired, our parish, which I had known as a welcoming home, ran into major difficulties and eventually disintegrated. That is still heartbreaking.

It is also heartbreaking that the church building that we had renovated under his leadership is no longer a Catholic church. After being damaged in a second major flood, it was closed and, years later, sold to a nearby Christian college. They have recently re-opened it as their chapel, but it is no longer the place we built together. Even the stained glass windows had been removed.

We will lay him to rest from his boyhood church, though, which is fitting. That church is also the mother church in our area, meaning it is the oldest congregation.

One of his favorite Bible verses was from Micah 6:8:   “And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.”

And he showed us how to do that.

Another passage is also coming to mind for me, from Matthew 25:21:  “Well done, good and faithful servant!”

I am also thinking of a setting of the final commendation, which is a prayer at the end of Catholic funerals, that we used to sing in Resurrection Choir when Father James would be presiding at parish funerals. The setting was done by Ernest Sands and used this refrain:  “May the choirs of angels come to greet you. May they speed you to paradise. May the Lord enfold you in His mercy. May you find eternal life.”

Amen.
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Linda’s prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday this week is “break/brake.” Join us! Find out how here: https://lindaghill.com/2016/05/20/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-may-2116/ .

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SoCS: commencement

An open prompt! Thanks, Linda! I don’t know that I could have dealt with anything too exotic…

I am writing this on Friday afternoon and scheduling it because tomorrow is spoken for.

We will be spending the day in Syracuse, attending the festivities for our daughter T’s commencement from SUNY-ESF, which is short for State University of New York – Environmental Science and Forestry. She will be receiving an MPS degree in Conservation Biology.  (MPS stands for Master’s of Professional Studies.)  Her program was multidisciplinary and geared toward doing conservation/restoration work in the field, rather than doing lab research.

She also concentrated her work with plants. She loves to root out invasive species and help  and/or re-establish native ones. She can wax poetic about it! She has had the opportunity to do three internships and we are hoping that an appropriate permanent position will appear.

Tomorrow, there will be a reception with her department in the morning. Commencement is in the afternoon, followed by a reception, followed by dinner back in her neighborhood.

We are so happy for her and as proud as can be!
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Linda gifted us with an open prompt this week: start the post with a two-letter word. We could also end with a two-letter word for extra fun. Come join us! Find out how here:  https://lindaghill.com/2016/05/13/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-may-1416/

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