mass online

I had hoped to attend vigil mass yesterday afternoon but the level of dysautonomia, pain, and fatigue I was having made it inadvisable. It was cold and I didn’t think that I could handle the amount of walking and being upright involved, even if I went to a nearby church rather than my own church which is a further drive.

Instead, I participated in an online mass through Heart of the Nation. While a local station televises the mass on Sunday, I was able to access it online on Saturday. One of my favorite homilists was presiding and viewing online gives a bit more time so I got to hear more music than in the televised version.

Back during my mother’s illness, she used to watch mass on television when she could no longer attend in person and visitors from the church would bring her communion from time to time. Eventually, I was given a pyx so that I could bring the Eucharist to her myself. It is mentioned in this poem, first published by Wilderness House Literary Review:

In my purse

cheap pens I won’t miss if they’re lost
my wallet, heavy with too many coins
ibuprofen for headaches
a pack of tissues
hair ties for windy days
a dog-eared calendar
my license to drive
a crumpled shopping list
emergency cough drops
a pyx
my favorite mechanical pencil, extra lead
credit cards – insurance cards – loyalty cards
a laminated prayer card from my mother’s funeral

One of the blessings of the pandemic shutdowns for me was the re-discovery of online or televised mass when I couldn’t attend in person. It’s comforting to have that alternative on weekends like this one.

I may need to take it more often in the future if we can’t get better control of my symptoms.
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